Among the constant stream of disappointments, hurdles, and generally unexciting things currently in my life, I’m learning that it’s most important to keep my focus on things that make me happy, as well as to take pleasure in the little things that (hopefully) come to me on a daily basis.
The job search is incredibly discouraging, and with my pursuits exclusively in New York, it only drives home the burning desire to return to a city that understands me. A city with a soul.
The recent beacon of light for me, one I’m almost hesitant to talk about, is the fact that I finally had my manuscript, roughly about two-hundred pages right now, read in its entirety by my advanced fiction professor. He’s someone who I admire deeply for his biting humor and incredible list of accomplishments. But, he hates essentially everything that crosses his desk. So, naturally my thin skin was nervous to offer up two years of work to be torn down.
Well, the critique came back last week and I can’t believe the result: he liked it. Read it through and enjoyed it, even “enjoying the problems in it.” I’m floored. It’s amazing to discover how incredible it feels for a risk to pay off. I’ll be swapping emails with him and spending workshop time one one one to improve the manuscript with him. It feels real that I’ll be able to have something substantial - and something that’s maybe actually good - with which to return to New York.
If my dream of being a novelist could come true…well, for once, I’m at a loss for words.
M
